July 2025 quick thoughts and vision

 Well. Star Trek Prodigy is tapping into my nerd side and I think we are in for a good time. 

Today's moment of laughter and hmmmm. The precious toddler was in full tilt remote control bumper car mode and got distracted by something and the next thing I know mini- Janel said,"wait, what was I doing?" We both thought for a minute and then remembered the bumper cars. Learning about yourself while watching your kids grow up is a real trip. Information overload in fact. 

Oh Lord in heaven there is spider swimming under my neck in the bathtub. Spider moved to edge thanks to early exposure to "be nice to spiders." 

I hope and think that Catrina is right. As we make choices toward intentional healthy parenting and ways of bearing our own loads in a healthy way we stand a good chance of giving our kids a leg up from where we started. In some cases as a nurture defeating nature scenario. I do think my parents gave me somewhat of a leg up. I had enough independence and pure nails fostered within me to ride the wild rollercoaster adulthood offered right out of a few dark places instead of give up within them. I actually feel like I am friends with my brain now. I have a goal that the kids feel their own leg up on recovery pathways from whatever obstacles I create for them roughly 25 years earlier. 

Brief interlude as something I typed about dream boards disappeared when my phone died. I intended to look at my dream board when getting out of the bathtub. I don't know why but I arose this morning with optimism rather than trepidation about the future. 60/40 instead of 50/50. I think Tawna inspired me with her reminder that 6 months took her from a hopeless situation to freedom. 6 months can do things! The squeeze I feel can lead to some exciting changes I think and perhaps with 3 coffees and a host of friends nearby I can have more good days of thinking and dreaming. I think this is when I want to get slightly profound and say the proper term for the dream board is actually a vision board, and I think that is significant. To me, a dream can happen while asleep. It may or may not be remembered or taken too seriously. A vision is more likely an awake scenario, awake to share with more people than whoever might be around to hear about a dream before you forget it. A vision that is spoken, visualized, contributed to by others, and over time realized. That was more profound inside my head than typed out.

So. The vision board. I just took a bath (rare occurrence when you don't have city water) so skin healing... check. It actually says help heal your skin from within which is extremely deep but I also think well underway. Speak up? Well for better or for worse that is happening. Travel..."cooler trips"? Well I actually saw myself taking a trip to Oman for CE someday as an adventure and that is an exciting dream. I ran a Wikipedia on it and it is noted as safe for women, light on crime, unlikely to be groped, but do not speak against the government. Plant lady? Hey, they are still alive. Enjoy with friends is a lifeline this year and I am thankful beyond measure for friends. Dare to fall in love? Hey I thought about it for 3 seconds and didn't laugh. This is progress. Together we build...a chicken coop. There is a strong possibility that somehow I will have chickens here in about 1 month. I just need 6 men and a truck. Tastier drinks is not really showing much progress unless I go to Heather's but that is ok. Smart snacks needs work. Intentional work as our government will probably be having me pack ALL the lunches and I might call CPS on myself if Oliver eats turkey and cheese sandwiches every single day. Learn investing secrets needs help. Well, in the monetary department. Investing time in things of importance and protecting myself from things that aren't has made great progress. Folding stuff...no. No progress there. Play+sleep needs to start about now as it is 11am.